1. I like to pretend that I’m the main character in my own story. 

When I’m walking along the Malibu beach, I look wistfully out towards the horizon. I like to imagine that, at this point in the story, the author is describing my thoughts and feelings in detail as the audience reads on in awe. 

Everyone is looking at me because I’m the main character, not because I’m slowly walking into the ocean fully clothed. Wow, my jeans are getting really wet.
 

2. I know for sure that casting directors hang out by the beach and look for actors for their new films. 

I heard that Aaron Sorkin solely did the casting for The Trial of the Chicago Seven by looking around Zuma Beach. So basically, if you hang around a beach in Malibu for long enough, you’re guaranteed to end up starring in a Hollywood blockbuster.
 

3. I drive with the windows down and play music loudly. 

I then promptly roll them up when my hair starts to annoy me. I then turn my music down as the family in the car across from me look over and I get self conscious about playing Ariana Grande at full volume.
 

4. Walking on Malibu sand feels like running gold dust between your toes.

Maybe it’s because in 1841, Jeremiah Goldust dropped a bucket of gold dust on the beach. When he went to scoop up his treasure, he was unable to tell the difference between his gold and the sand. Some say the ghost of Jeremiah Goldust still roams El Matador State beach looking for his lost fortune.
 

5. I act like a LA billionaire.

The great thing about Malibu is that you won’t run into any of your LA friends, so you can pretend that you’re a billionaire strolling along your own private beach. Unfortunately, that fantasy is slightly ruined by the family at Lagoon Beach trying to control their children crying at their ruined sandcastle. Also, you should probably watch where you’re walking so you don’t run into any sandcastles.
 

6. You can remind yourself how unfit you are by taking a hike at Solstice Canyon. 

Sometimes it’s fun to remind yourself that doing 20 pushups a year and running once a month doesn’t quite get you the fitness you need to prevent you from puffing heavily as you hike. The waterfall at the end almost makes it worth your wheezing.
 

7. You can see stars in the night sky.

As the sun sets and you look up at the sky, you may be able to make out these strange twinkling lights. These are called stars. If you live in LA, you may not have heard of these before. There’s nothing to be afraid of, though, they’re supposed to be there. The only thing you have to fear is the ghost of Jeremiah Goldust looking for his lost gold.